Friendship

I had my friend take these photos because it shows a lot about gendered friendships. In general, activities and doing things tend to be the center of masculine friendships, whereas conversation tends to be the center of feminine friendships. For instance when female friends get together, they usually talk to further build their friendship. In general, girls show closeness by sharing their personal feelings, experiences, fears and problems. On the other hand, men tend to show closeness by doing activities. For instance when men hang out with one another, they tend to play sports, video games or watch a game. Since my friend and I are showing closeness by doing, we are engaging in a masculine style of friendship. One of the reasons I like to hang out with him is because I enjoy playing video games and some of my female friends do not. When I need a break from the stress of school and life, I send him a text to see if he wants to play. However, when I need someone to talk to, I text one my female friends. I find different values in both my relationships with men and women. In my friendships with men, I enjoy doing activities with them and playing games. It serves as a great distraction. However, I am glad I also have female friends to talk to when I need emotional support. I think it is good to have both styles of friendships in life. In addition, my male friends tend to come to me when they want to talk about something personal or emotional. I think they do this because girls tend to be good listeners and make talking about feelings a central part of friendship. Men also tend to go to females to talk because they don’t tend to get that support from their male friends. Women also tend to seek male friends when they want diversionary activities to take this mind off troubles because men are more likely to suggest diversionary activities to take a friend’s mind off his/her troubles. Because of this, I seek male friends when I want distractions and female friends when I need emotional support.

I generally enjoy doing activities with my friends rather than talking with them. Because of this, I tend to enjoy a more masculine style of friendship. However, this doesn’t mean I am masculine in all other areas. Gender is not a dichotomy, it is a spectrum. I may like masculine style friendships, but I also like feminine colors and clothing.